Rock 'N' Roll Nightmare (1987)

When it comes to horror movies, everyone gives game-changers like Psycho (1960) and Halloween (1978) a lot of flack for being responsible for giving us, the unprotected viewers, untold variations-on-a-theme. As a matter of fact, if it wasn't for those two films, most of the "HORROR" sections in the movie rental stores of my youth would be empty.

There is another film, however, that doesn't get as much flack for bringing many wannabes to the movie/video arena...but it should.

And that film, ladies and germs, is The Evil Dead (1981).

Think about it: if not for Sam Raimi's classic, any fledgling film-maker wouldn't have a basis for getting his or her foot in the door to show what kind of talent they have. This was a blueprint for films like Roger Evans' Forever Evil (1987), Michael Mfume's Ax 'Em (1992), Jason Stephenson's Off the Beaten Path (2004), Brett Anstey's Damned by Dawn (2009)...and no, you've probably never heard of many of these films.

After all, what can you expect; some of them went direct-to-video. Others still went direct-to-obscurity.

Then we have John Fasano.

Who, you ask?

Well, to be fair, he has been better known as a co-writer for films such as Another 48 Hrs. (1990) about Eddie Murphy and Nick Nolte re-teaming, Darkness Falls (2003) about the Tooth Fairy, and Shauna: Every Man's Fantasy (1985) about...well...go ask your parents about that one. But for the purposes of this review, John is also a director who created a little film about rock and roll and nightmares. Named...appropriately...Rock 'N' Roll Nightmare.

How can we tell this is a true rock and roll movie? Because they only used one letter from "and" for the title, and replaced the missing letters with apostrophes - more rockin' that way, you know.

And it also was written by and stars someone who should be a legend in modern-day motion pictures. This man's name is Jon Mikl Thor, one of Canada's sons and the main reason anyone nods their head in head-banging fashion whenever Vancouver is mentioned.

What does any of this have to do with The Evil Dead, though? Glad you asked - let's get to the plot:

At an old Canadian farmhouse, a typical Canadian family mysteriously disappears at the hands of unseen Canadian forces which approach from low swooping camera angles outside. Coincidence? Prolly. After which, a van full of Canadian rock 'N' rollers, led by John Triton (Thor), arrive at same-said farmhouse, pile into the house and prepare to record their rockin' Canadian music in the adjacent Canadian barn, retro-fitted with Canadian recording devices. What follows is the appearance of various rubbery Canadian demons, which make various Canadian musicians and groupies and hangers-on possessed, force them to disappear and so forth until only one of them is left, and must do battle with the one responsible for the horrific Canadian goings-on.

In a basic description like that, one would think that this is, indeed, just another Evil Dead rip and leave it at that. Well, you're right on that count, because this IS just another Evil Dead rip - Canadian-based at that, per The Cunningham-Mancuso Directive. However, you have to understand that there are a few things that make Rock 'N' Roll Nightmare a horse of a different color.

First and foremost is the direction. Fasano doesn't have the quick skills of a Sam Raimi and so misses an opportunity to make with the quick camera cuts, different angles and comic-book-style lighting, like an issue of "Tales from the Crypt". Seeing how this was Fasano's first directorial attempt, I guess we can chalk it up to freshman jitters. Of course, the interminable van ride to the farmhouse is enough to make you think Harold P. Warren forgot to put the title sequence into THIS movie, as well (Obscure Movie Reference #72 - you're welcome).

Next we have the script itself. As written by Thor (Jeez; every time I write this guy's name, I picture him with a Viking helmet and swinging a hammer around...), we get characters that serve no real purpose other than victims, lame-joke reciters and a plot that, as far as story goes, is pretty routine. Except, of course, for one plot twist by the end that not only comes out of left field, but comes out of left field riding a brontosaurus, firing a laser cannon and singing "The Immigrant Song".

The effects are another matter. You'd swear that the effects crew must've gotten a sweet deal from Canadian Rubbers and Textiles for all the little rubbery demons and mutants that crawl around the film, especially at the end when the End Boss comes around...which is something one must see to believe. Or maybe that's too high a price to pay. Anyway....

Now we come to the acting. I guess we get what we expect from a movie named Rock 'N' Roll Nightmare. Thor heads up the cast and, like everyone else we see, at least has the big hair and glam Eighties wardrobe one expects for a flick from this era. No one really has much conviction in their dialogue, which makes it hard to accept when geeky manager Phil does his comic relief simpleton act or groupie girlfriend Randy grabs her breasts to indicate her want for male companionship (let's just say) or when Stiggy....

Okay, gotta stop here and mention Stiggy at length. The actor's name playing him is Jim Cirile, he's only acted in two movies, he now owns and operates a movie script evaluation website and, as this character - who is supposed to be Australian - has what must be the absolute worst Australian accent this side of Yahoo Serious. At least Yahoo's originally Australian, though. Cirile grates on the nerves, his voice puts teeth on edge and makes small dogs sterile and makes you long for the subtlety and charisma of a nice young soccer hooligan. In short, Cirile gets my vote for worst actor ever. Ever.

Back to the movie now: At no point in this flick does the viewer expect or get anything more than an Evil Dead goof with Canadian ham aplenty and lots of "rock" songs (see the quotes, there?) throughout courtesy of our boy Thor. Songs like "(You Give Me) Energy" and "We Live to Rock" make you long for the days when bands like Ratt and Quiet Riot roamed the countryside freely, but do very little for setting the tone of what is supposedly a horror movie.

Just a minute, though: IS Rock 'N' Roll Nightmare supposed to be a horror movie? What with the abundance of comedy relief from every other character, the laughable demon puppets, stupid characters doing stupid things and the aforementioned denouement that will quite literally leave you staring with slack-jawed incredulity at your TV screen, this thing has more laughs that NBC Thursday Nights. You don't imagine that this was written, cast or directed with the firm conviction of scaring people. Rock 'N' Roll Nightmare looks to have been written with crayons on the side of a circus tent. Really.

This may be a bad film, but it's a bad film I can certainly get behind. When you watch Rock 'N' Roll Nightmare, all you find yourself thinking is, "who comes up with this crap?" Quite rightly too, all things made known.

Thor may not be that well known in general, for his music nor for his acting, but at least with Rock 'N' Roll Nightmare, he has given the world something to marvel over. Maybe not regard with the same kind of awe as a Bruce Campbell or a Vincent Price, but in a movie with rubber killer starfish and one-eyed gape-mouthed demon lumps with troll hairdos, you take what you can get.

My advice to you: find yourself a copy of Rock 'N' Roll Nightmare and, whatever you do, make sure you're sitting down for the last 30 minutes to make sure you are prepared for the most amazing ending to an Evil Dead ripoff ever. I mean it: you will be floored. And that's not the kind of comment I just throw about lightly. And don't you dare go on moviepooper.com and see what the ending is: get the movie and see for yourself - you won't be disappointed.

However, if you're a fan of The Evil Dead or Sam Raimi...you may very well be disappointed.

Rock 'N' Roll Nightmare (1987) 2010-10-02T21:42:00-07:00 Rating: 4.5 Diposkan Oleh: admin